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Happy Wife ~ Happy Life...

I ran across this list buried in a file somewhere and I thought, "Wow, I could really benefit from these practices!"  Maybe they'll help you too?  Be sure to click the links and read the bible passages for each one.

Twelve Rules for a Healthy Marriage...

1. Never both be angry at once.

2. Never yell at each other unless the house is on fire.

3. Remember that it takes two to make an argument. The one who is wrong is the one who will be doing most of the talking.

4. Yield to the wishes of the other - as an exercise in self-discipline, if for no other reason.

5. If you have a choice between making yourself or your mate look good - choose your mate.

6. If you feel you must criticize, do so lovingly.

7. Never bring up a mistake of the past.

8. Neglect the whole world rather than each other.

9. Never let the day end without saying at least one complimentary thing to your life partner.

10. Never meet without an affectionate greeting.

11. When you've made a mistake, talk it out and ask for forgiveness.

12. Never go to bed mad.

Life Is...Relationships!

Nothing will determine the quality and direction of our lives like our relationships.  As our relationships go, so goes our lives. 

Very few things can ruin relationships faster than gossip.     Here's a helpful definition ~ "gossip is passing on information about others when I am neither part of the problem, nor part of the solution."

FACT ~ Gossip destroys relationships.

FACT ~ God totally hates gossip.

FACT ~ Gossip is the Devil's playground.

Most people don't realize that the Devil's name refers to his favorite strategy for ruining our relationships.  Whenever we slander, criticize or accuse others falsely...we're being duped into doing the Devil's job for him.

We all know that spreading gossip is wrong, but did you know it's just as wrong to listen to gossip?  Listening to gossip is like accepting stolen property, it makes you just as guilty as the person who committed the crime.

In order to have a great life, we must work hard to maintain great relationships.  So here are a few  biblical ways to guard your relationships from gossip.

Six Steps To Stopping Slander - OR - Six Rules For Respecting My Relationships...

1. I will not listen to, or give audience to, anyone who's sharing the shortcomings of others.
2. I will dismiss negative reports about others and give them the benefit of the doubt.
3. I will immediately redirect the gossiper to the person they talked about.
4. I will not repeat what I heard to anyone other than the involved parties.
5. I will protect the reputation and dignity of those in my relationships.
   
6. I will make no exceptions to these rules.

Proverbs 26:20 says, "Where there is no fuel a fire goes out; where there is no gossip arguments come to an end."

I've never met a person who worked hard at relationships and lived a lonely, regret-filled life.  But I have met lots of people who are living lonely, regret filled lives.   As your relationships go...so goes your life!

God has spoken...all the rest is conversation

Con‧ver‧sa‧tion ~ "informal interchange of thoughts, oral communication between persons."   Too often we get obsessed with the sound of our own voices.  When it comes to communication in relationships, most of us are good at making conclusions, corrections and comments.  But very few of us are good at the lost art of conversation.      

In communicating your thoughts there are only 2 choices...

• Monologue ~ where the only voice heard is our own.

• Dialog ~ where we exchange ideas with others.

The bible describes people who use more monologue than dialog as foolish ~ read for yourself.
Jesus was not only the greatest communicator who ever lived, but He was also the greatest conversationalist who ever lived. Jesus leveraged the power of personal conversations to...

~ Reveal His identity to people who were spiritually far from God...here's an example.

~ Help people take their next spiritual steps...here's an example.

~ Develop His disciples into growing leaders...here's an example.

Instead of telling others how to think or what to believe, we'd be wiser to follow Jesus' example of using the art of conversation. Following Jesus' method of conversation is a simple as A, B, C...

Ask good questions ~ For someone who knew everything, Jesus sure asked a lot of questions.  In fact, He asked 183 of them.  Jesus asked personal questions, unsettling questions, re-aligning questions, and transforming questions.

Too often we give people answers to solve their problems instead of using questions to draw them into a conversation.  Jesus used questions in conversation to get people to open up and engage Him in deep and personal exchange.

Be a good listener ~ Jesus always "heard" what were saying in response to His questions.  All too often, we use the time when others are talking just to figure out what we're going to say next.  Jesus modeled hearing people by listening to them.    

I am constantly amazed at how often I encounter people interrupting each other in conversation.  OK ~ I'm just as guilty.  What I'm saying is that I'm not a very good listener - how about you?  Take this quiz to see for yourself.

Clarify God's truth ~ Jesus always helped people understand what God already said.  More than anything, people need to hear God's voice, not our opinions or advice.  To those who were struggling ~ His conversation was comforting.  But to those who were self-serving ~ His conversation was discomforting.

God has spoken...all the rest is conversation. We're never more like Jesus than when we leverage the power of conversation to help people discover, process, and engage in the greatest dialog ever ~ the one that's going on between their heart and God's.